We Don't Need "Fixing"

Though not front-page news, by any means, one interesting headline that has gotten some attention this week has been the news of a new book, titled “My Beautiful Mommy,” by author Dr. Michael Salzhauer. The novel is a children’s book, aimed at youngsters around ages four to seven, which explains the story of a mother getting cosmetic surgery (specifically, a nose job, tummy tuck, and breast augmentation) and having to explain the process to her small child.

At first, this definitely seems alarming. It does not seem like it was so long ago that cosmetic surgery was not the national phenomenon that it seems to be right now. However, with growing numbers of patients going under the knife, there are more and more people effected. Salzhauer explains (as detailed in a Newsweek article) his reasoning behind the book, which serves as a means for parents (specifically mothers) to be able to easier explain the process of their cosmetic surgeries to their children.

While it might seem that most individuals concerned with child development would oppose the advent of such a novel, that is not entirely the case. Child psychiatrist Elizabeth Berger, as explained in the Newsweek article, likes the idea of a children’s book. She believes that the process of cosmetic surgery can be very lengthy, and that it definitely needs some sort of explanation to young children. As parents may be absent, out of commission, and/or appearing like they may have been involved in some sort of violent acts, the availability of a book that can explain the idea of cosmetic surgery may not be such a bad thing.

However, Berger does acknowledge the negatives. She also worries that children will seemingly want to follow “mommy’s” example, and desire to get their own cosmetic surgeries done. I find this to be the most potentially harmful piece of this further normalization of cosmetic surgery. As it can be seen in several of my previous blog posts, beauty standards are inherently impossible to avoid in our lives (be it through media, culture, etc.), as we are being conditioned while we grow up to adhere to a strict set of aesthetic rules. I think that the idea of trying to normalize this behavior to children runs an extreme of risk of even further conditioning them to think along the lines of, “I must alter myself in order to be beautiful.” If “mommy” gets her cosmetic procedures done in such a seemingly normal way, then why wouldn’t her children feel the need to do the same thing?

While cosmetic surgery may not be going away, I do not know if it is wise to so easily provide children with even more reason to believe that their bodies and appearance need “fixing.” While I am not at all claiming that people shouldn’t be allowed to have whatever cosmetic surgery they so desire, we also should not work to condition people in our society any further to feel the need to always need “fixing” to be beautiful. We must work to prevent more and more of these messages from building up and in turn being conditioned into individuals, as it only creates people who feel aesthetically inferior for the rest of their lives…and that is a harm that cannot be cured.

Accepting what is Inescapable

While someone may not be able to transform themselves into “white,” they are fully able to slightly “tweak” themselves and get one step closer. While it is not the perfect situation, one can at least accept these actions as desires to fulfill some sort of inherent beauty standard which we cannot erase.

This is what Tyra Banks seems to think.


Why is it that our culture in today’s world is so conditioned to follow what is seemingly one set of Western beauty ideals? Though some may argue that it is not the only form of beauty, every other perceived “beauty” is only labeled as such for its exotic appeal and “Other”-ness, thus separate from the prevailing ideal of Caucasian beauty.

Even if solely changing one's eyelids, hair, or similar smaller features may not turn a person into the perfect representation of white beauty, it nonetheless is still an attempt to fit aspects of this ideal. If this is the idea of beauty, though, how are we supposed to escape it? One cannot change how they have been conditioned, and as a society, we have been conditioned to feel that the white beauty standard is the beauty standard by which we compare and judge all others. From the time we are small children, this has been implanted into our minds, and it is not necessarily right or wrong to “conform” to this ideal. However, it is important to at least accept that these standards are the reasons why, as a society, there is a desire to look and exist a certain way. While there may not be any easy way to change these standards, it is necessary to increase the awareness and knowledge that these beauty ideals do govern our lives, whether we realize it or not.